kuda | Weather Update And A Joke

Today is the coldest day in twenty years in Texas.
Where I live it didn't get to 20 degrees today.
Snow forecast for early Friday morning.
They claim it won't be icy, but fluffy snow.
Dang it! I live in Texas because I hate cold weather.

SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because gosh-darn it, he's a maverick!

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change!
                                 The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he
                             recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue
                             with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road.
                                 This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that
                                 every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road.
                                 But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know
                                  if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against
                                  us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL: To the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image
                            of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken.

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it!
                         It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions.
                        I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants
               to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes
               and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a NEW CAR so
               that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hard working American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going.
                                   I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when
                                   the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider info.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?
                   Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road
                                 move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
                    Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.